Just A Thought #1

I know that a second is a fixed unit; however, since I first heard about how some dinosaurs were so large it took seconds for nerve signals to travel to the brain, I've separated the idea of absolute time and experienced time.
Experienced time is the rate at which our nervous system can process stimuli and act. In absolute time, this time is unique to each species, since each species has a unique anatomy. It is with this time that we measure our days and our lifespans. We view mice and insects as preternaturally fast. Spider-Man's precognitive spider sense is one example that comes to mind. We view the behemoths of ages past as plodding imbeciles and wonder how they could possibly have survived at such a slow pace. However, our opinions are based on our experiential time.
If I was to somehow become a diplodocus, mamenchisaurus, or even a amphicoelias, in absolute time my experienced time would have lengthened, but I wouldn't notice the difference. Experienced time is constant. What I would notice is that I lived in a world of incredibly fast little creatures that somehow seemed to know in advance if I was trying to squish them.
If I were to become a fly, I still I wouldn't notice a difference in the passing of time, but I'd live in a world of incredibly slow giants. I'd laugh at them as they try to squish me and wonder how beings could possibly exist if they move and react that slowly.
I think it boils down to relativity and perspective. We say a worker bee has a lifespan of a year, but if it can process its environment 40 times faster than we can, has it not lived 40 years in that span?

Double Processed Grilled Cheese (with Bacon)

Yesterday I went out for lunch and ordered a grilled cheese sandwich with bacon. Five minutes later, much to my chagrin, I realized I had not inquired as to the type of cheese the restaurant used in their grilled cheese sandwiches. When it arrived I was not surprised to find melted processed cheese-food oozing out of the sandwich. I was surprised, though, to find there were two types of cheese-food used in the sandwich: the regular light, school-bus orange-yellow plus white! It didn't make for much of an improvement, but I swallowed my dismay and persisted in swallowing the sandwich.
VERDICT: Polite. Bacon makes everything better and liberal amounts of ketchup doesn't hurt either.

Smooth Palpatine

I came up with this idea a long time ago. "Smooth Criminal" by Michael Jackson just screams to be Star-Wars-ized to me. However, I lack what many people call "musical ability", so this idea has lain dormant for a long time. I would like to see if I can harness the power of the internet to perhaps get this idea to become a reality.

So, without further ado:

Smooth Palpatine

As you first came to the temple

Yoda saw your fear was parental

But they trained you, you were chosen

And then the bloodstains on your master

While you're flying, a saviour

Somehow he runs the Republic

He can see you are unstable

He is your friend, it was your doom

Ani are you okay

So, Ani are you okay

Are you okay, Ani

Ani are you okay

So, Ani are you okay

Are you okay, Ani

Ani are you okay

So, Ani are you okay

Are you okay, Ani

Ani are you okay

So, Ani are you okay

Are you okay, Ani

Ani are you okay

Will you tell us that you're okay

Assassin out the window

You guard me, but dream of your mom, Ani

Tusken's take her, you can't save her

So you killed them, men, women, children

Go save Obi-wan, lose your hand

We were married

It was your doom

Ani are you okay

So, Ani are you okay

Are you okay, Ani

Ani are you okay

So, Ani are you okay

Are you okay, Ani

Ani are you okay

So, Ani are you okay

Are you okay, Ani

You've been tricked by

You've been struck by

A smooth Palpatine

So you crossed the whole galaxy

With Ahsoka, where did she go?

Clones, our soldiers, dying for him

Swinging sabers, Negotiations?

Annie are you okay

So, Annie are you okay

Are you okay, Annie

Annie are you okay

So, Annie are you okay

Are you okay, Annie

Annie are you okay

So, Annie are you okay

Are you okay, Annie

Annie are you okay

So, Annie are you okay

Are you okay, Annie

Annie are you okay

Will you tell us that you're okay

You saved him and killed Dooku

But can you save me from your dreams, Ani

On the council, not a master

Says he'll save me, you bow down, Vader

Then you ran into the temple

And you struck down

It was your doom

Annie are you okay

So, Annie are you okay

Are you okay, Annie

You've been tricked by

You've been struck by

A smooth Palpatine

Okay, I want every Jedi to be killed right now!

Aaow!

Annie are you okay

I Don't Know!

Will you tell us, that you're okay

I Don't Know!

Assassin out the window

I Don't Know!

He tricked you, a Sith Lord, Annie

I Don't Know!

You killed them, men, women, children

I Don't Know!

The bloodstains on your master

I Don't Know, Why Padme!

Then you ran into the temple

I Don't Know!

And you struck down

It was your doom, Annie

Annie are you okay

Where are you, Padme

Will you tell us, that you're okay

Where are you, Padme

Assassin out the window

Where are you, Padme

He tricked you, a Sith Lord, Annie

No! No!

You killed them, men, women, children

Where are you

The bloodstains on your master

No! No! No!

Then you ran into the temple

Where are you

And you struck down

Oh, you killed me, Ani

Nooooo!

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Can someone help me create this song?